Well, I just finished an assessment to go see a psychiatrist I used to see 2 years ago. She left but now she’s back and I really like her. But in order to see her I had to go through a full assessment to make sure that I qualify for the services.
Well, I have to say it was quite difficult. Reliving everything that has brought me to where I am today, the depression, PTSD, fibromyalgia, nerve damage and anxiety.
Bringing up all those things has caused me to feel very low today and a lot of anxiety. But I know I have to learn to get past a lot of things that have happened to me in my life.
But I had no concerns as to whether or not I’d be able to see my former doctor as she had already allowed me to get an appointment for next week I just had to go through the formality today. Since I last saw her a lot has happened in my life and apparently my PTSD has definitely gotten worse. It has triggered some serious depression. Something I already knew but to hear them say it I don’t know it seems kind of strange and hurtful. Get it’s a relief because I know I’m not faking. I have an invisible illness. Actually I have several invisible illnesses. I wanna get deeper on my blog here so I think the next time I may wanna talk about betrayal.
Anyway the spiritual side of me is coming out and I’m your name to grab my Bible and really delve into the message our Grand Creator gives us. Looking into the beautiful Psalms, or reading accounts of bravery like Jonah. Although he ran in fear & ended up in the belly of a fish, he eventually was out of the fish & completed the direction God gave him.
I feel like I am in the belly of the fish metaphorically of course. I feel like I have run away from so many problems in life. Although I didn’t have direction from God like Jonah did to send an urgent message to people in a town that was going to be destroyed, I know when I read my bible I do in fact have a mission & if I can pull myself out of this metaphoric fish, i can find bravery. I can find my true self. I can follow the direction that is meant for me…
Thanks for stopping by.💜🙏💝